Part 1 – How and Why a Bedtime Routine Can Benefit Our Children
What do your evenings look like? As a busy parent, they probably include making dinner, finishing up chores, and getting the kids off to bed as quickly (if not efficiently) as possible. After such a busy day, you’re probably just looking to just relax and maybe read a book, watch some TV, or maybe browse around on Pinterest for hours on end admiring and pinning projects that you know you’ll never actually get to (guilty!!). This much awaited time never seems to arrive when we are so busy trying to deal with wrapping up our children’s day and getting them to bed! But, what if I told you that while we rush about trying to get our kids to bed, we are missing on valuable bonding and language-learning time that can be a tremendous benefit for them?
I know, I know! After a long day, sometimes we just want and NEED time for ourselves. But just give me a chance! With a few tips and tricks for purposeful time spent together in the evening, our nights can go more smoothly and with less stress, our learning day can be extended, and we can create memories that our children will carry with them for life. But first, let’s cover the “why?” what are you gaining by spending some quality time with your children in the evenings?
- An Insight Into Their Day
Do you ever ask your kids how their day was and they tell you “fine”? Or “what did you do today?” and they respond with “nothing.” AGHHHH!!! It drives me nuts! But it’s not just you. Kids don’t always open up to these sorts of questions, because they either don’t have the skills to process their day on their own so quickly (if they are young) or they are not practiced in the art of conversation with their parents. It takes time and effort and one has to be purposeful in establishing lines of communication, especially with our kids. Spending time together and asking questions like “What was the funniest thing that happened today?” or did “anything today make you feel sad?” can help kids engage and share with you about the day. But here’s the thing, you can’t just bombard them with a bunch of questions and expect them to answer right away! You need to take the time and develop an engaging conversation.
2. An Insight Into Their State of Mind
By gaining insights into their days you can also gain insights into their state of mind. As kids get older, parents often get pushed aside. Kids try to gain independence and if you haven’t developed communication habits, it can be that much harder to really KNOW what’s going on inside their heads. Issues of self-confidence, depression, bullying, anger, selfishness, etc. can be discovered and managed more easily when kids learn they can come to you to deal with them.
- Calmer Evenings
Did you know that negative behavior can be curbed by simply giving a child some time and attention? Most of us know this, but do we actually KNOW this? I mean, do we actually put it into practice? Just sitting down for 10 minutes with your child and actually playing with them can give them the attention they need and crave and then buy you some time to get things done in a much calmer manner. Imagine then if you actually include your child into the chores and activities that must be completed in the evening? You can entertain your child, teach them something new, have bonding time, and get your chores done even faster! Even a three-year-old can help wipe down tables and put away laundry!
- Bonding and a Nurturing Relationship
Bonding is an important human instinct that gives children (and adults) a sense of security and self-esteem. Bonding occurs when humans spend time together, talking, showing affection, and taking care of each other. The thing is that bonding takes time, and not just your spare minutes. You need quality time spent doing special activities, but you also need quantity time! When I say this, I mean ordinary time spent doing routine activities that, although they may not feel special, they develop trust and a sense of nurturing and security. This time serves to let a family get to know eachother, reinforces mutual respect, improves communication and lets people learn to listen and communicate with each other.
- You Will Gain an Opportunity to Help You Children Process Their Day
Establishing an evening and bed-time routine with your kids will help them process their day. They can reflect back on what happened and discuss the good, the bad, the ugly. You can help kids put a positive spin on their day and help them plan and prepare for tomorrow. It’s a great time to discuss goals, both small and large, and talk about the future. It’s also a great time to teach kids about thankfulness and the effect that their actions and choices have upon their lives and the lives of others.
- Extended Education
Finally, this time together at night can serve for practicing language and communication. For bilingual parents, this can be a crucial time of target language input. If your child spends a majority of the time listening and interacting in the community language, the evening spent with you can be crucial for practicing the target language and using it for higher order thinking and learning. You can model grammar, language structure and vocabulary and give them plenty of opportunities to emulate you. Most importantly, you can develop your relationship in the target language and help your child gain the confidence to use it.
Our days are busy. We are constantly running around with the business of life and we don’t often take the time to just be with each other and spend time in communication and bonding. Whether you are a parent who works outside of the home all day or you are a parent who works in the home all day, the reality is that you most likely spend your hours working! When the evening comes and kids get home from school it’s important to take time together to process the day, use our language and communication skills, and create the kind of deep relationships that will be crucial for the rest of our lives.
Stay tuned for Part 2 of this post where I will share some Ideas and Tips for Establishing a Bedtime Routine for your Bilingual Children.
We want to hear from you! Do you have a bedtime routine that you practice with your kids? What does it look like? What benefits have you seen from it? Let us know in the comments below.
About the Author
Keli Garcia Allen is a certified Spanish teacher and currently works as a Preschool teacher in a bilingual classroom. She is the Head of Content for Learn Safari and is currently working on Spanish Safari, a Spanish Learning game for children 4-10 years old. You can follow her and the rest of the team on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter.